1163I’ll be the first to admit that despite being 100% Jewish via family lineage, I don’t know a whole lot about going to temple – or the religion I was born into. But when it comes to church and Protestantism or Catholicism…now those are two subjects about which what I don’t know could fill encyclopedias!

Whatever…as it turns out, I’ve done an inordinate amount of volunteering in the past week…most of it at St. Bartholomew’s in preparation for the the big Fare Share Friday program the church runs every Friday after Thanksgiving, the culmination of which features a catered dinner in the cavernous cathedral…attended by magnates and the homeless sitting together…and all of it catered by the Waldorf staff next door. Talk a bout a wild and crazy event. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen street wackos sounding off with millionaires as their audience (not to mention millionaire wackos sounding off to the street guys)! Continue Reading

Heather_LocklearA while back I wrote an entry titled “Here’s Mud In Your Eye” describing a ludicrous situation during which I heard one woman instructing another on how to rectify the pain she was experiencing from getting semen in her eye (apparently it hurts)! Well…if you listen to what Heather Locklear has to say, it turns out that just so you don’t get it in your eye…a good shot to the face of a substance men actually manufacture in their loins is the secret to keeping her skin looking so smooth and soft! And actually science bears that out!

Personally, I’m not about to try it – even if jizz came in a bottle! But convincing your best girl to go for a facial administered direct from the source might be a little easier now as all you have to do is show her this video. I mean come on…if it’s good enough for Heather…it ought to be good enough for for the object of your affection – or even your significant other (good luck with that)! Who’d a thunk?!?! Continue Reading

The_First_Thanksgiving_cph.3g04961-665x385Like with most families, Thanksgiving had always been an excuse for my people to get together for the traditional turkey, stuffing, sweet potato and cranberry sauce feast. Nobody gave thanks for shit before we sat down to eat. We just blathered away until it was time to gorge ourselves and then proceeded with no acknowledgment of the particular holiday. It was only later in life when I was the one to stop everybody and give a little speech thanking whom or whatever for giving the family enough intelligence and a work ethic for all of us to go out, make a living, and thus have the financial wherewithal to provide ourselves with adequate food and lodging for the holiday. Continue Reading

539wIn theory – and at its inception – tomorrow’s holiday is about giving thanks for the bountiful harvest that feeds us. Yup! Just a simple celebration of the sowing and reaping of crops the consumption of which keeps us healthy and strong. But I wonder how many people have lost sight of that, simply grabbing the opportunity to slack off for a day and eat and/or drink till they pass out. For nowadays, Thanksgiving seems more like a holiday dedicated to gluttony, shopping for bargains and watching professional football than it does anything else. Continue Reading

imagesSniffing around the old SCREW mag folder this morning, I found this masterpiece from yesteryear. It’s a beaut. Notice how free and easy I was with the lingo in The World’s Greatest Fish Wrapper back then!

Yep! We all gotta die some time! But Lord, please don’t take me while I’m busting a nut in a tranny ho house! This particular prayer was NOT answered for the unfortunate guy featured in Billy Bob’s latest ode to the escort biz. May the luckless guy’s tranny-chasing soul rest in peace!

Yes, I know fooling around with the time-for-money set is a lot of fun and games – that is – until you have a heart attack right in the middle of all the festivities and (God forbid) die in of all places…a tranny ho house! Of all the indignities! I can just read the headlines now. JOHN SMITH, DEDICATED HUSBAND AND FATHER OF THREE, DIED YESTERDAY OF CARDIAC ARREST IN A SHE MALE BROTHEL. Talk about posthumous humiliation! Continue Reading

224055With nothing to say today, I posted a slightly edited repeat and then turned on the boob tube for a little mindless entertainment. And the instant I saw an 800 pound woman on the Learning Channel, I had something to say. This story goes back over a decade to my Action days when it was my job to answer every call and try to sell every would-be advertiser an ad that was bigger than they needed.

Anyway…my phone rang with some guy in New Jersey who wanted to advertise and like the good employee I really wasn’t, I rode to Penn Station on the bike and then hit NJ Transit to some horrible ghetto town over the Hudson. To my utter revulsion, my prospective client lived in one of the dirtiest houses I’ve ever seen. The girls were all hood rats (I met a couple on the way up the stairs) and the boss? A 1000 pound blob! I thought I was gonna throw up, honestly. Between the fucked up town…and the ghetto-ass girls…and the filthy domicile…and then finally, the morbidly obese boss…it was just too much! Continue Reading

my-friend-you-are-full-of-crapAs an advocate of a woman’s right to be an escort, I generally like to give the girls the benefit of the doubt when it comes to them articulating their dreams of getting out of the business. And in fact when it comes to Asians, my generosity of spirit is often rewarded. More than once I’ve witnessed Korean escorts and/or escort/owners go straight opening up clothing or eyelash-enhancing boutiques. Over time, they seem to mature and grow into more societally acceptable entrepreneurship. But when it comes to American girls? Mostly, they’re just full of shit. Continue Reading

jamieAlysha Lopac might have been my favorite escort of all time. The reasons are many. First, using the aliases of April, Jamie, Lisa and many others, Alysha advertised literally everywhere an escort could…figuring that whenever she turned on her phone, said phone would ring with a customer on the line within 30 seconds. And when you’re the guy selling the ads, that translates into more commissions for you! So I was in love right away!

Next…she had big, natural tits which I’m sure the customers enjoyed. But that didn’t matter to me. We weren’t “friends” like that! Still, her massive mounds did work on my behalf as lots of guys went to see her and thus, Alysha always had the ad money when I arrived. Continue Reading

Jodie-Foster-on-the-set-of-Taxi-Driver-1The neighborhood in which I live (The East Village) has always been known as a Bohemian mecca which attracted creative and eccentric types. At least, that’s been its reputation. What legend leaves out is all the drugs, hookers and on-welfare Puerto Ricans who lived to rob and burglarize the gringos who dared live in their ghetto.

Well…all that has pretty much changed now as the hood is hardly a “hood” anymore. The drug dealers are gone…the hookers are gone…and even most of the Puerto Ricans are gone. Only if you go to the C Town supermarket coincidentally located on Avenue C do you hear cashiers talking to each other in Spanish! Continue Reading

Ronda-Rousey-Body-IssueI’m not a huge fan of sports whose sole purpose is for one participant to kill the other. Not only does it seem a little barbaric…but I get the idea it promotes violence among the idiots in our population. You could say that my favorite sport, American football, fits into that category and thus, I’m a little hypocritical. But at least there’s some finesse and ballet associated with all the bludgeoning. With sports like MMA? Just a little too over the top for me.

Whatever…today, I’m not about inciting some sort of debate on the subject of which sport is the most violent because I figure nobody would argue that MMA takes the prize in that category. I mean…in boxing, when you knock your opponent down, the rules state that you have to retreat to a neutral corner. In MMA, you pounce on the opponent and keep pummeling him (or her) until you kill him (or her)…or the referee jumps in. Whichever comes first! Continue Reading

I’m a big fag for fall colors. I’m just gay that way…what can I say? Unfortunately, it’s only rarely that I get a chance to experience the eyegasm that changing leaves induces in my very being. But this year was different.

Up until just two or three years ago, fully experiencing fall foliage meant a $100 car rental and a long drive there and back. Owing to all the effort involved, and my intense work schedule…I’d be lucky if I made it once every fall. But then I discovered the Short Line Bus Company and Metro North Rail. For $15 – $20 round trip and an associated 1.5 – 2 hour ride, I could kick back, leave the driving to others…and simply bask in the glow. And with my freelance existence, I took full advantage of the situation. Continue Reading

sheen-261x300TWO AND A HALF MEN, once tv’s most popular sitcom, was at its core a celebration of the fast life as seen through the womanizing Charlie Harper character whose promiscuity not-so-coincidentally mirrored the life of Charlie Sheen, the actor who played him. While most of America saw both Charlie’s in a comedic light, nobody’s laughing at Sheen’s alleged HIV positive status, which  substantiated rumor has it he’ll be revealing on the Today Show this very day! Continue Reading

shoeRarely do I find worthy entries which I haven’t republished at least once. But I found one today. I know that because this one comes from a time when I used caps instead of italics for emphasis. So here goes. Enjoy.

Increasingly, it’s getting more and more societally acceptable for men to utilize the services of escorts. And as each celebrity comes out of the closet – or gets outed for fooling around with the pros, society as an entity collectively shakes its head and resigns itself to the inevitable: It appear that virtually all men eventually succumb to the temptation. But what happens if we put the shoe on the other foot? I mean….it stands to reason that if guys buy pretty women, shouldn’t girls buy pretty men in our increasingly liberated society? Continue Reading

futurama-fry-should-i-lol-or-roflmaoI’m not a huge texting guy. I figure if Alexander Graham Bell (or whomever) invented the telephone almost 150 years ago, why would I wanna go back to the telegraph (which is basically, what texting is)? Regardless, I’ve been communicating with a few women recently who clearly prefer texting to actual verbal intercourse. I don’t know…maybe it’s because they have so much intercourse of another variety that conservation is the order of the day. That must be it. Continue Reading

img108As I finish reading a newly-published book titled “THE OREGON TRAIL,” it comes as a shock to me that its brilliant author spends several pages describing a fruitless endeavor to gain his dad’s admiration. I just can’t imagine a father, himself a magazine publisher, displaying anything but immense pride with a son who’s such a brilliant writer. Yet right to dad’s dying day, sonny boy never felt like he’d finally made the grade.

I myself was more fortunate. My father wasn’t around on a daily basis and thus, didn’t demand much of me. If I could make him laugh (which I mostly could), that was about all he needed. That was how Popsicle measured men. And if you were talented, that impressed him as well. Continue Reading

twerk12n-4-webAnd according to the tape, one definitely was – at least literally! But still…too ludicrous for words. In case you missed it, a stank career garden tool (if her arrest record is any indication) named ANNA MARIE KNIGHT was recently thrown in the can for groping a guy on surveillance camera in a Washington DC gas station right after her girlfriend was taped twerking dangerously close to his privates.

Guys who frequented “the deuce” in the olden days are all too familiar with women of the night jumping out at dudes to squeeze their midnight-hour junk and ask if they want a date. But that shit don’t play in the 2010’s! Bitch got arrested for sexual harassment! Word! This is a new day, ho. That door swings both ways now! Continue Reading

bait-and-switchThe old bait and switch! In this context, we all know what that means: Beautiful picture…but ugly girl when we arrive. It’s happened to everybody more than once. But baiting and switching to hoodwink a customer is as old as the world’s oldest profession itself, and it was never more evident to me than when I backed up several oldies bands in a previous life.

Yup! From the Shirelles…to the Crystals…to The Belmonts…to the Dubs….the Moonglows…Gary US Bonds…the Chiffons and on and on…I churned out a meager living playing guitar and/or bass for the agency who booked all these acts. Ten to fifteen years after their hey day, these performers held my attention for a hot minute. After all, I’d grown up with their music…I’d bought their records in some cases…and at the tender age of 25 or so, felt they were surely a steppingstone to greater success. Continue Reading

If VIVICA FOX, former girlfriend of 50 CENT has anything to say about it, half the guys who pay to see escorts just might be gay. Here’s her theory – at least on the face of it: She claimed in a televised interview that “Fitty” loved analingis…and in the same breath implied there was something unclear about his sexuality. And anybody who’s ever read the contents of sites like GFE CLUB and TER are all too aware that many of the contributors are into receiving this type of sexual activity.

I got news Ms. V. I’m not so sure about all that. Lots of people – gender notwithstanding – like to have their asses licked. If he wanted to be penetrated – especially with a phallic type object – you might have more stable ground to stand on. Just my opinion. In my world, there’s a debate as to whether guys who go see trannies are gay! But then again…maybe my world is more enlightened than yours. Continue Reading

Given the profligate poop culture we’re all a part of, celebrity-following…watching… and hopefully meeting…is almost as big a thrill as getting a good blow job. I mean…look at all the magazines dedicated to celebrities and the sheep who adore them! Ya got The Enquirer, People Magazine, all those teen rags…and even columns concerning nothing but the famous and their everyday comings and goings in The Daily News and New York Post! And don’t even get me started on that other medium…the television. Anybody ever seen TMZ, Entertainment Tonight or Extra? It’s almost impossible to avoid the tsunami of meaningless crap about the rich and famous. Continue Reading

nevadaWhile reading the adult jobs section of Backpage this morning (on behalf of an internet-challenged friend who’s looking for a sugar daddy…yes, there are ads run by wannabe sugar daddies in that section), I found an interesting sponsor ad which advertised “Come to Toronto. Business is booming and it’s all legal.” Curious as to how true that claim actually is, I embarked on a quick research project to study not just the business’s legal status in Toronto…but other places here at home as well.

While providing sex in exchange for money is legal in Canada…most of the activities surrounding or facilitating the sale are not! Just for example, soliciting in a public place is against the law – effectively criminalizing street action. And owning, managing, working in, or patronizing a “bawdy house” is similarly illegal. Obviously, this puts a constraint on the business and the ambiguity in Canada’s existing law has led some in the judicial system to depict the situation as “bizarre.” In fact, the Canadian legislature has declared what amounts to a one year moratorium in which they hope to redefine their position on the trade after several challenges to existing law have further confused the issue. Continue Reading

It’s late and who wants to leave the house or wait for a girl to arrive when video chat with this and many other girls is just a few seconds away? Check it out! And every time you hit the refresh button, you’ll see a different girl. Or click the girl’s pic and the sound comes on.


Cowgirl_VivianeOver the years I’ve done business with Russians, Czechs, Germans, Swiss, English, French, Italians, Nigerians, Canadians, Colombians, Chileans, Peruvians, Koreans, Chinese, Japanese and really…girls from virtually every country and of every religion and ethnicity in the whole wide world. It’s part of the New York experience. Everybody comes here to pursue their own version of the American Dream and if you live here…you get to meet them all. You would think that with all this diversity, I’d have known my fair share of southern belles as well. Ya know…American girls who worship George Strait…drink beer at a bar…and holler yee-hah when their favorite song comes on the juke box. But you’d be wrong. They just aren’t here! Continue Reading

aziah-king-goes-by-zolaFirst it was The Incredible Zoltar who turned Tom Hanks “big” in the movie of the same name. And now an equally fantastic story comes from a woman I call The Incredible Zola. But this one isn’t about getting big. It’s (to me) an incredibly boring ebonic rant the likes of which I’ve heard 100 times before from one Great American Hoochie Mama or another. Yet Twitter blew up over this ghetto drama and the reprobate who wrote it is about to get her 15 minutes of fame – and fortune via a movie deal! Or more in her vernacular…bitch gonna make major cheese offa dis drama, yo! Continue Reading

5108-8237Like with almost every American girl who works the escort biz, every American guy I ever knew who drove a yellow cab (except maybe for actual students) was at the core, a loser. The pathologies varied…but the end result was the same. A hot mess. Drugs, alcohol, lazy, stupid or some combination of all of these yielded the predictable result. But that didn’t mean there wasn’t a colorful character or two in the rank and file. And one whose name I’ve never mentioned on this blog was a guy named Steven Murphy. Continue Reading

Bill-Clinton-I-Did-Not-2If you think that sites which issue disclaimers (this one included) invented the language of deniability, guess what. Or as my old man used to say…”You think you hippies invented pot?”…in an effort to inform and discount how “heavy” and “far-out” we all thought we were. The language of deniability is as old as say…the world’s oldest…you get the idea! Continue Reading

6f9ecec624d9f877863a4a14a026f6f5_crop_north copyThough some may not be aware, sports do exist outside the bedroom door. And given that yesterday was a big day in New York sports, allow me to share my views on our New York franchises.

Let’s start with the Mets. Our boys lost for a few reasons. Like, their inability to throw out a base stealer. And their bullpen sucks. But what riled me most was the effusive praise the commentators laid on this guy which made Hosmer’s (for the A’s) stupid base-running error look like a daring and champion-caliber move. It wasn’t until the 12th inning that one of them even suggested that Duda’s throw was horrific…and that Hosmer would have been out with any kind of decent throw to the plate. Instead they lauded him with praise for taking a wild gamble which shouldn’t have paid off. Continue Reading

Hundred dollar bill copyOver the years, I’ve written two autobiographical pieces about how I arrived at my bizarre station in life. Up until this morning I only remembered one until I grabbed an old Screw Magazine from a pile of publications gathering dust in the corner and found this version – which I like a whole lot better. So here it is…THE UNMAKING OF DOLLAR BILL!

Every man I know wants to swap jobs with me. John the cab driver, Joel the doctor, Don the editor, Rocco the cop. They all want my job. I’m an adult advertising rep, a laughable euphemism for a guy who hops on a bike and chases escorts down for the advertising money they must spend in the local papers and websites to attract clientele. All the horn dogs think my life is glamorous. It isn’t. I’m an artistic soul (yeah, right!) who coincidentally found my way to New York’s seething underbelly as a cab driver and freelance writer. This is not a gig I ever sought or asked for. Regardless, here’s how I got it: Continue Reading

26brothel_spanAs we all know, the term “reality show” is already an oxymoron. Like…who in his right mind would believe that crap isn’t completely staged? Well anyway…in the course of doing nothing all day, I happened up on a Backpage ad run by a girl I’d spoken to before. With nothing else to do, I dialed her up to work some sort of magic. And during our meandering verbal intercourse, the subject of the Moonlight Bunny Ranch came up. Without any provocation on my part, she began to tell the story of her employment at the Nevada oasis a few years back. And trust me…it wasn’t pretty…and absolutely nothing like what you see on HBO. Continue Reading

urlBoy oh boy! I’d like to have a dollar for every time I’ve seen an escort ad with some sort of reference to the advertiser being a school or college girl. I mean…is there anybody left in the lecture halls at Harvard (or Wellesley) – or are all the girls holed up in the local motel awaiting customers?

Well…to be fair, there are a few girls who are at least taking a class or two in some school or other – if they aren’t enrolled full time. But for every one of them, I have a feeling there are ten who are either bull shitting the viewers – or themselves – about furthering their education and/or changing their careers. Continue Reading

cartoon-black-and-white-line-drawing-of-a-guy-writing-a-letter-by-a-dog-house-by-ron-leishman-6594Every so often, I email a girl who was paid to see me in the room back in my recent past. Of all the hotties where the woman worked, she just might have been my favorite. So why not stay in touch? After a one month lull in our correspondence, I awakened this morning to see a message from her which read “How’s my big man and my little man?” This was my answer:

The former stands at attention – and the latter phattens with anticipation at the mere thought of Miss Honey’s message lying in wait in my mail box. Both engorge with hot blood seemingly prepared to burst with excitement at the very sight of your unread correspondence. Continue Reading

round-file-paper-toss-e1321803801399You’ll recall several months ago I was commissioned to write a piece for THE DAILY BEAST which for some reason never ran (though I have an idea why). Regardless, I actually wrote not one – but two versions, one of which sucked…while the other is actually pretty good. Mostly, I fire off half-cocked on my own blog. But given the opportunity, I almost know how to be a pro. And right here’s the proof. (Go figure.)

This piece might ring a bell as I ran an abbreviated version not too long ago. Thus, the first few hundred words are a repeat…but the bulk is new.

We read, hear and watch a lot of bull shit in the media about traffickers who lure girls into the escort profession. Maybe it’s true…and maybe it’s fiction. But I gained a little insight this afternoon that might really turn the mainstream on its ear. Continue Reading

tumblr_ku2ejeNntJ1qza0kuo1_500 copyIt’s no secret that wherever you find military installations, you’re gonna find women who will play with the boys in exchange for their hard-earned pay. You might recall that I’ve chronicled the brothels of pre-attack Pearl Harbor right here. But that was a benign sort of situation in which girls signed on willingly to make a small fortune at the world’s oldest profession. What about the Vietnam War era during what could arguably be called America’s darkest moment? Now that was a different story! Continue Reading

150708_CrimeMosby.jpg.CROP.promo-xlarge2On more than one occasion, I’ve mentioned that if you want to meet a quality woman, volunteering at a soup kitchen (or anywhere really) might be a good place to do just that. And while I maintain that opinion, I did find a hustler in the ranks at The University Soup Kitchen.

Yesterday was a big event at the aforementioned free food giveaway. Twenty some volunteers showed up from Jet Blue and the corporation donated not one – but two free round trips to be raffled off to any volunteer who wasn’t affiliated with the corporation. Continue Reading

Create-Nightclub-3_54_990x660Anybody who’s ever spent an inordinate amount of time pursuing women in bars or nightclubs knows from experience that there’s no worse place to find a girlfriend than that particular venue. Or at least, that’s my opinion…as I can say without equivocation, that in all my years drinking and carousing, I never once developed a meaningful relationship from that not-so-happy hunting ground. Yeah, I got a cheap thrill or two…but nothing serious. Continue Reading

popolopenAny experienced outdoorsman will tell you that hiking alone is a bad idea – for obvious reasons. If you break an ankle or have a heart attack on the trail, it could be hours before anybody arrives to help! Yet, I hike alone for a few reasons.

First, it affords me the leeway to go on a moment’s notice. I’m up…I just took a primo dump, it’s sunny, and I have an hour to get to the bus. I mean…how many more reasons do I need? Continue Reading

To those of a certain age, SUZIE NERO was a legend. Just like ANNIE SPRINKLE, Suzie was one of the original busty porn starlets from the 70’s/80’s.

I know it seems ridiculous to guys below forty years of age, but when geezers like me were kids the only way you could watch porn was at home on your movie projector. And getting those crappy black and white 8 mm jobs wasn’t that easy! Well…all that changed with the seminal entry DEEP THROAT (when you could finally go to a movie theater and see some fucking), and then of course, with the invention of the VCR and finally, the Internet where as we all know – pornography is ubiquitous. Continue Reading

hooker2Ever fascinated by words, expressions and their derivations, I happened upon the etymology of the word “hooker” recently while reading a book about 4 female spies during the Civil War (very interesting reading by the way). In the text, the author offers the derivation of the most commonly used slang term for a woman who sells sex.

George McClellan was arguably the weakest general ever to lead American forces in wartime. In fact, several historians claim that had he had any balls at all, the war would have been over quickly and hundreds of thousands of lives saved. After a while, Lincoln had had enough of his pussified leader and fired him in favor of Ambrose Burnsides (whose odd beard birthed the term “sideburns”) and then Joseph Hooker after Burnside lost the Battle of Fredricksburg. Continue Reading

girl-computer-featureIt’s been a while since I snapped on the profligacy of the Great American Hoochie Mama. And given that it’s high time – and there are no GAHM’s on this site to insult, why not revive the old memories if just for a day?

First, a definition: GAHM’s are American escorts of all colors and religions who hold themselves above their raisin’. Or to use the ghetto vernacular…they think they’re all that while I do not! Most find their own stories fascinating…so much so that I’ve heard the statement “I could write a book” on way too many occasions. Continue Reading

1103-woman-on-phone_liAt the request of one of my favorite phone girls, today’s psycho rant will be directed at guys who make reservations and then don’t show or call to inform her they won’t be visiting after all. Those of you who are as old as I will recall that once upon a time, a guy could book a flight on any airline and pay no penalty if he missed that flight – or simply changed his mind opting not to travel at all. As a result, lots of guys booked but never went to the airport. To address this problem, ticketing agents over-booked every flight under the assumption that a lot of people wouldn’t make the trip and sometimes…when too many people showed…the carrier would be stuck with more flyers than seats. Continue Reading


Our DOLLAR BILL takes a quick trip to Europe via a returning provider/reporter to discover that in many ways, The Continent is a better place for the objects of our obsession to offer their services than our very own Big Apple. Read on to discover the ins and outs of the occupation over in Euroland!

Judging from the multinational division of escorts New York has to offer, one could rationally conclude that selling companionship is the exclusive domain of New York based ladies – or at least selling it here is far more profitable than anywhere else in the world. But in fact, nothing could be further from the truth. The trade is actually practiced worldwide and especially in the case of Europe, is much more safely pursued on The Continent than it is here in the good old US of A! Continue Reading

B1CMZsTCYAAewdMTurning testosterone-fueled teenage boys on to classical music would seem like a task too difficult to undertake. I mean…dudes wanna rock and roll, yo! Enter SARA X, the premier goth Internet tit-twerking sensation. That’s right…you’ve read correctly. Equal opportunity twerker that she is, Sara is tit-twerking’s number one advocate. Why should all the twerking fun be reserved for booties when boobies can effect the same euphoria in men aged 8 to 80? Continue Reading

220px-LamarOdomLakersA while back, one of the reps I dealt with at some paper or other asked me “What’s the secret to your success? Guys come and go in this business but you continue.” One word was all I needed in response: “Moderation.”

This was apparently a lesson lost on LAMAR ODOM, NBA champion come reality star. Odom hung for several days at one of Dennis Hof’s joints…spent mid-five figures getting his groove on…got himself jacked up on more than pussy…and was found unconscious and drooling fluids. Last time I checked…that’s not moderation! Continue Reading

DollarSignJust over a month ago I posted this entry for just a few hours and then buried it. Owing to the startling number of page views it garnered, I’ve thought better of my editorial decision and bring it back today with pictures. Enjoy!

If there’s one question I’ve fielded ad nauseum since embarking on my adult ad-selling “career,” it’s the one about who’s the hottest girl in New York. Of course, all that crap is subjective and anybody who would even pose that thought doesn’t really get it. Alternatively, more business-oriented individuals get down to the real nitty gritty: “Who makes the most money?”…to me a much more thoughtful question. And so I think back over the years and offer up a few. Continue Reading



Even after observing the metamorpheses in the escort biz and attendant adult ad service industry for 19 years, I’ve never grown bored with their evolution. Especially when it comes to the Asian community.

Back when I started my employment at Action Magazine, New York boasted only a few Asian places, almost all of which offered a dozen or so attendants none of whom I found attractive in the least. Each place had literally rows of small cubicles and a big, burly security guard who kept the peace. Servicing 100 guys per day wasn’t extraordinary. The joints reminded me more of K Mart than Saks or a Madison Avenue specialty boutique. Continue Reading

laptop-sky-screensaver-open-screen-saver-isolated-over-white-background-34910628Yesterday, a reader left a comment asking questions about what exactly is in that data base I’ve referred to in the past. As I’ve said, the guys are color-coded (blue is good…yellow is marginal…and red equals no entry) but that’s not all the information contained in your “file.” Continue Reading

we-are-family-1You would think that people who get together for the purpose of turning a buck in the escort business are strangers on a collective mission. Ya know…like the phone girl never knew the owner or any of the girls who go in the room before she got the job. But often, that’s not the case at all.

Like just for example, a phone girl I had the pleasure of eating lunch with yesterday informed me that a crowd favorite will be coming back to work at her boss’s house – and that she’s been friends with the girl since Middle School back in Korea! Obviously, this is no coincidence. When it comes to Koreans (or at least the Koreans on this blog), it’s an organic family thing. There’s no nasty whip-wielding boss who imports these girls or tells them what to do. They go where the money is – of their own volition – and often in a bunch. Continue Reading

Back in 1996 when I was hired by Action Magazine, the Asian incall scene was much different in Manhattan. The houses were much fewer – but the choice at whatever existed much wider. Pink track lighting illuminated the padded bench where 8 to 12 sat when you entered. And a big burly security guard stood by the side ensuring no hanky lanky ensued.

The girls weren’t nearly as good-looking as they are nowadays. Nobody used real pictures…and most importantly for today’s contribution, there were just a few owners – all females – and all as rough and tumble as it gets. They yelled…they screamed…they abused the customers…they abused the advertising guys…and on and on. Not familiar with any escort community at the time, I figured that at least the Asian portion of my employer’s advertising pie would be quiet and reserved. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Continue Reading

business-insider-7-reasons-why-america-should-legalize-prostitutionRecently, a reader sent me a link to an article about a sugar daddy/baby site which functions just like a dating site with the exception that the listed ladies (who get free memberships) are mostly college girls looking for sponsorship. While sex isn’t necessarily part of the deal, the fact remains that boys will be boys and the great majority of the time we can assume it’s implicit in the transaction in much the same way that law enforcement assumes the same for escort sites. And it made me think about the many definitions of prostitution – be it sexual or otherwise. But for the moment, I’ll concentrate on the former. Continue Reading

boat_show_hooters_girls_960pxDuring a conversation with a retired escort last night, I broached the subject of cruising (boarding a cruise ship) explaining that I’d considered going on one for a second but decided not to based on a few factors…not the least of which is the harsh reality that barfing my guts up could come with the vacation package thanks to tainted food, rampant viral disease, or rough weather. We’ve all heard the stories and however blown out of proportion they might be, the facts speak for themselves. People blow chunks more often on cruises than they do at home! Continue Reading



One of my pet peeves in not just the escort world – but in the entire speaking-English-as-a-first-language world as well – is people who don’t know the difference among “their,” “they’re,” and “there” and especially, people who don’t understand where and how to use an apostrophe. There are a surprising number of trained/educated individuals who fail miserably in both of these realms. It’s not just the exclusive domain of escorts. Continue Reading



Once a source of endless frustration, I would write numerous entries about a special escort,” seemingly to shed the frustration of dealing with one of the most self-centered women the world has ever known. She’s all but gone and forgotten now after over a decade of stormy weather, but the icon of self-delusion lives on in my archives – if rarely in my memories. Here’s one of the very few anecdotes which remarks on her bizarre nature in a benign light. Enjoy.

If nothing else, a “friend” (who is finally returning from Florida today) provides excellent grist for my writing mill. There’s nothing like a wacko off-the-chain escort for imparting surreal and skewed perspectives. During yesterday’s call, Miss Thing stressed over airport security and whether she would be hassled getting on the plane to which I answered “You’re a blonde-haired, fair-skinned European. Not a swarthy Saudi! Why would security give a crap about you?” Continue Reading