An orgasm is a funny thing – especially when you have it with a partner. Here you are in the most intimate of settings and more often than not, it’s accompanied with no verbal intercourse. You’ve been talking and talking with your prospective hookup leading to the magical moment and then when you finally get there and are about to ascend to the summit…all that verbal intercourse eludes you. And this goes for not just the guy – but the girl as well.
I have a pet peeve with the women I can somehow convince to sleep with me. There is rarely if ever any verbal intercourse accompanying the sexual kind when she reaches her peak. This muddies the waters. Often, it’s difficult to know when – and even if – the woman makes it to the top. Thus, you can’t know exactly which technique or movement is ringing her bell. A little play by play might be in order.
I had an old girlfriend who in all honestly, I didn’t especially like. She threw herself on me (both literally and figuratively) and I just went with it. It was only during intercourse that I enjoyed what she had to say. “Yeah, just like that!” she’d purr. And it wouldn’t be long before the woman would be groaning her approval – signifying the obvious. She was having an orgasm. But still…no verbal confirmation!
Now it’s not that easy to have an orgasm and say anything intelligible. I’ll grant you that! But I’m starting to get it down -even if the lines are relatively pat. Generally, I’m given to surrendering to a woman’s omnipotence at the magic moment – as in “This is too much pussy for me. I can’t hold out any longer!” Or similarly…”You’re just too much woman for me to handle. I gotta blow.”
Of course, I have to gauge my partner. The latter line works better with a woman who’a a little insecure. But I’d never use that one on a conceited girl. It would only serve to blow up her already inflated ego further. The former works for everybody except maybe a woman who’s had some babies. She could misinterpret the “too much” part as her being too big down there – a reality no woman wants to face!
But I digress. Just a few nights ago I was with a super hot woman to whom I announced my impending orgasm. She’d gotten hers and it was time for me to get mine(s). “Good,” she oozed. “I want to hear it!” This I thought was cool! In retrospect, she might have meant a lot of huffing and puffing and groaning – as in decibel level. But I interpreted it as her requesting that I talk my way through it. And so she got the whole nine (centimeters): Loud and verbal! And no doubt, the woman felt powerful when it was all over. Or she didn’t. Who cares? I felt drained and that’s what matters most to a selfless guy like me!
A final note: Where does the “whole nine” expression come from? Answer: During WWII, aircraft machine gunners’ ammunition clips were nine feet long. So when it was time to riddle the objective with multiple bullet holes, the gunner’s flyboy homies would cajole him “Give ’em the whole nine!” Kind of works as a sexual metaphor as well when you think about it. Whether it’s nine yards…nine feet…nine inches…nine centimeters…or even nine millimeters…you want to hit it like you mean it as you reach the peak. And you might want to accompany it with a little verbal play by play as well. It serves as icing on the cake for a hungry girl with a sweet tooth. I mean…it’s human nature for one partner to want to know that he or she really satisfied the other. So if you like that partner why hold back? Give her the whole nine…both physically and verbally…and guaranteed, she’ll come back for more! At least, that’s the way I figure it. But then again…what the fuck do I know?
P.S. If you recognize the play by play guy pictured in this post you win a prize. A half price ride on the bus or subway!