For a “senior,” I actually embrace a lot of the new stuff my grandparents probably wouldn’t have. But reality tv – and especially the Kardashians – don’t make the list. Consider this: The entire family mythology began when the paternal Kardashian (a lawyer named Rob) successfully defended a murderer – actually getting him off for a crime his client clearly committed.
I know that every defendant is entitled to legal representation. But that doesn’t mean a lawyer can’t reject a client (unless he signs on as a public defender). It’s not like they’re cab drivers who by law must pick up every fare (unless they’re intoxicated) who waves at them. So by me, Rob (and Johnny) were whores. They knew their guy did it – but they took the big paycheck regardless. Anybody notice that they both died before their time? No, I don’t think their early demises had anything to do with their defending a murderer. But some people might.
To the point. I do not keep up with the Kardashians. I barely know that the Jenners and K-moneys are in-laws of some sort – and they have a tv show – and they’re drama queens who show off their tits and asses. Oh yeah! And Kim has a big ol’ booty. And she’s into rappers. Sounds like I kinda know something about them after all! Hard to not!
So I did a little Google search before writing this worthless crap about even more worthless people. And what did I come up with? A sex tape of Kim sucking a rapper’s dick! Now there’s a surprise! And I actually saw similar performances by PARIS HILTON and MILEY CYRUS (actually, I’d already seen the Paris tape). Weird, dudes! Why you wanna let the world see that?!?!
Whatever…it appears that all three girls are pretty good PSE-providers. But I gotta give Kim her props. She “keeps up” with the other sluts pretty well – and with the porniest of the guys (read Ray J has the biggest joint of the three “lucky” guys who got to show their most private of moves to the entire world). Plus, Kim’s got that ass!
Ya know what…I think I’ll cut this short and go watch some of her stuff on demand. Maybe it’s time to keep up with the Kardashians after all. Just kidding of course. Pornhub is chock full of chicks who can outdo Kim with one hand tied behind their backs. If I wanna watch a prodigious oral provider, they’re are olympians out there. Who needs her?
On that note, I think I’ll go work on my new tune…one which would have cost me thousands of dollars to record back when I made a living in music. Now? It costs nothing! I do embrace new stuff – especially when it saves me money! But reality tv and Kim? No sale. Check that. I did watch The Flavor of Love religiously. And then I got to mount one of the players in real life. For free, I might add! And she liked me and this blog, too! Maybe “they” should give me a reality show! Dollar Bill at the Catholic Worker (where I’m headed next)! Now that would be a snore right there. But no less boring than “Keeping up With the Kardashians” I have no doubt.