I know I occasionally snap on the girls for being irresponsible, sloppy or unappreciative. But there are an equal number of times when I’ll be their advocate as well. Take the issue of what a girl is willing to do in the room with a stranger. That’s a woman’s choice if you ask me! The “our body ourselves” feminist motto is one with which I’m in total agreement.
First and most obvious and at its inception, the credo addresses a woman’s right to terminate an unwanted pregnancy. But today I expand the concept to include an escort’s right to do what she wants – and conversely refusing to do what she she doesn’t want to do – with her customers. (It’s her body and she has the right to do only what feels comfortable with – and nothing more.) After all, it’s an accepted reality that escort work carries very little dignity…and as undignified as the work is (though it can be very profitable), it’s my opinion that a girl should be able to establish her parameters with a customer without having to answer for it on some review board or other.
And so…when I go on to these review forums and read some anonymous guy complaining about a girl who wouldn’t do something with him that in a million years I wouldn’t ask a girl to do – and something that I wouldn’t do in a billion years if I were in her shoes, I always take the girl’s side. I get this picture in my mind of an ugly, entitled masher repulsing a girl who’s just trying to pay her rent. And it grosses me out!
Pressure to do “stuff” doesn’t just come from the customer. It comes from the boss, too! And that can never be good. One person I dealt with in the past had a policy which required her girls to perform a few choice acronyms for the guys as a condition of employment. And predictably, girls who needed the job would yes the boss and then figure “I’ll do what I do in the room…and I won’t do what I don’t want to do…and deal with the consequences later.” And just as predictably, as soon as the boss heard a new employee wouldn’t do a required acronym, she wanted to fire the girl with no questions asked.
That’s when I’d whip out the argument that the job was already undignified enough… the girls didn’t need the boss to tell her she had to do something which repulsed her just in order to stay employed. But the boss lady wasn’t having it! Her attitude was “I’m not asking them do anything I didn’t do myself a thousand (actually a lot more) times when I worked!”
I even appealed to her sense of greed and avarice! “The girl’s cute and friendly. And except for those one or two acronyms, she’s great. You wanna fire her behind that?!?!” But still, she wouldn’t budge. “Rules is rules” was her credo. And really…the house regulars were spoiled. They’d come to expect that humiliating the girls routinely and with impunity was part of the deal. Hey! You run that type of place…you get that type of customer. What can I say?
Well anyway…I no longer need to debate the issue but still as a general rule and sign of respect, I don’t ask girls to do anything they wouldn’t want to do simply because in her shoes, I wouldn’t want to do that – and secondly, because it’s just the right thing to do. Anybody who wants to coerce a girl to do something outside her parameters just because he paid and he’s an asshole would be a customer I’d never see again if I were an escort.
The debate on this subject could go on forever…so let me stop here and just say this: Guys and bosses! Have a heart. Life’s highway has brought these girls to a dark place. Why you wanna make it darker? Give them a modicum of respect.